it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
