I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
