who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
40s are totally the cure
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
