This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Randomize
