I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
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We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
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That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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