I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Randomize
