well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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