So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
