I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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