I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
