hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I am midnight drunk by noon
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Randomize
