What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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