i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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