But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
