He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
