Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
