Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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