holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize