New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
