either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
He passed out mid-signature
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
