And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Randomize