No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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