Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
