i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
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