So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
