dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Randomize
