well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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