singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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