Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?

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(818): Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me? http://tfl.nu/awe5

Replies (45) Good night (2331) Bad night (977)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep

(732): View more from New Jersey

sorry. that wasn't for you

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(732): Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep (732): sorry. that wasn't for you http://tfl.nu/2avz

Replies (31) Good night (2054) Bad night (5229)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?

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(732): I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break? http://tfl.nu/m0ae

Replies (8) Good night (3973) Bad night (877)
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(917): View more from New York City

I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.

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(917): I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it. http://tfl.nu/n6vl

Replies (8) Good night (4398) Bad night (928)
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(678): View more from Georgia

I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.

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(678): I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom. http://tfl.nu/95nr

Replies (18) Good night (2191) Bad night (4107)
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(407): View more from Florida

i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point

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(407): i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point http://tfl.nu/9yf5

Replies (7) Good night (1542) Bad night (3465)
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(434): View more from Virginia

we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.

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(434): we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino. http://tfl.nu/w9ni

Replies (3) Good night (2937) Bad night (1146)
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(513): View more from Ohio

Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.

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(513): Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause. http://tfl.nu/kkfj

Replies (8) Good night (3527) Bad night (926)
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(217): View more from Illinois

I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them

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(217): I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them http://tfl.nu/sgxd

Replies (5) Good night (2127) Bad night (948)
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(914): View more from New York

Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.

(1-914): View more from New York

You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.

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(914): Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county. (1-914): You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud. http://tfl.nu/15gl

Replies (3) Good night (2119) Bad night (701)
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(765): View more from Indiana

I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no

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(765): I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no http://tfl.nu/iykq

Replies (11) Good night (1917) Bad night (524)
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(614): View more from Ohio

The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.

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(614): The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN. http://tfl.nu/jkdc

Replies (15) Good night (1648) Bad night (615)
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(810): View more from Michigan

hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list

(989): View more from Michigan

haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters

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(810): hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list (989): haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters http://tfl.nu/iy12

Replies (11) Good night (1525) Bad night (473)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

I need rollerblades now

(774): View more from Massachusetts

Rollerblades pick up bitches

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(774): I need rollerblades now (774): Rollerblades pick up bitches http://tfl.nu/hoew

Replies (7) Good night (975) Bad night (402)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.

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(570): No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong. http://tfl.nu/gy5i

Replies (2) Good night (329) Bad night (605)

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