before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
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I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
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The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.