Texts From Last Night

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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!

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  (413): no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo! http://tfl.nu/f58l
  Replies (4) Good night (2242) Bad night (2826)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.

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  (508): currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit. http://tfl.nu/vzj2
  Replies (12) Good night (5590) Bad night (1094)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.

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  (414): I want to frame my negative pregnancy test. http://tfl.nu/y335
  Replies (26) Good night (7356) Bad night (1169)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.

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  (412): Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country. http://tfl.nu/04vq
  Replies (18) Good night (5893) Bad night (976)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat

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  (214): so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat http://tfl.nu/flbd
  Replies (3) Good night (2492) Bad night (1107)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.

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  (815): you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night. http://tfl.nu/m1vr
  Replies (6) Good night (3533) Bad night (1175)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.

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  (914): He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away. http://tfl.nu/k6q1
  Replies (13) Good night (6831) Bad night (1220)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.

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  (405): Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable. http://tfl.nu/luso
  Replies (16) Good night (1198) Bad night (2344)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.

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  (360): You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch. http://tfl.nu/13cn
  Replies (5) Good night (3012) Bad night (719)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.

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  (205): I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment. http://tfl.nu/97ug
  Replies (4) Good night (1918) Bad night (613)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  You're the worst gay friend ever.

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  (314): No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like? (1-314): You're the worst gay friend ever. http://tfl.nu/4trc
  Replies (2) Good night (1784) Bad night (800)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.

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  (780): Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag. http://tfl.nu/5i0q
  Replies (2) Good night (864) Bad night (493)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!

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  (606): I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about! http://tfl.nu/4ra3
  Replies (2) Good night (433) Bad night (262)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!

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  (407): Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way! http://tfl.nu/w4wy
  Replies (2) Good night (503) Bad night (207)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.

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  (403): I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now. http://tfl.nu/13u4
  Replies (1) Good night (248) Bad night (358)

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