Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I wear drunk well.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
