Jerry, you need to find god
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
