we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
you mean i was at the winter classic?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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