he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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