we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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