Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
