He is such a slut. More and more my type.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I FOUND THE LEGS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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