I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Randomize
