grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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