I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Randomize
