At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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