Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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