I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
