I hate your face
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
