your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize