bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize