Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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