I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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