Me too!
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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