just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize
