My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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