I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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